When I tell people that I'm Hollywood's Success Coach, one of the first questions I often get is, "Oh, so you do a lot of managing expectations?"
And I've grown to really hate that phrase, "managing expectations."
It essentially means that I need to help you set more "realistic" goals and help you understand that your expectations may be out of control.
This. Is. Bullshit.
“Erica, please clean your room.”
“Mom, I’ll do it later!” {Story of my childhood!}
I swear the phrase “I’ll do it later” was invented by kids who didn’t want to do their chores.
When we were younger, that phrase meant the thing we said we’ll do was at the bottom of our priority list. It was this phrase we thought would magically convince our parents that we would, in fact, complete the task, but in a very nebulous time frame.
The consequences of using that phrase were limited to chores being completed at the absolute last moment—essentially living in a mess for as long as we could get away with.
What are your current circumstances?
You know, the ones that are holding you back from achieving anything GREAT in Hollywood.
Are you low on money? LA is hella expensive.
Do you lack a network of connections? They say LA is all about who-you-know.
No resources?
Feeling alone?
Low on energy?
Lack knowledge?
Lack representation?
There are a million ways your circumstances could suck right now.
And you may feel that all of them are reasons why you aren't where you want to be in your career.
I know I've felt that way before. Especially when it comes to M-O-N-E-Y.
But I've got some good news. (And some bad news.)
When you’re still stuck in your day job, and a lot of time has passed, your dream begins to feel more distant.
The more distant your dream becomes, the less your subconscious understands how to get there.
And the less your subconscious understands, the less you take actions towards your dream.
And the less you take actions towards your dream, the longer you stay in your job.
It’s a vicious cycle and it’s easy to feel trapped.
But there is a way out.
Hollywood throws a lot of crap at you.
It’s an industry that feels like the Mean Girls table at lunch.
I mean, you wore pink on Wednesdays, and you’re still not allowed at the table. WTF?
You’re working hard and doing your best, and all you want to do is sit at the table, and be part of the glamorous life.
But you keep getting knocked down.
Whether it’s articles you read, or phrases you hear around town, the rejection is so much bigger than a “No” at an audition or interview.
Big dreams require big leaps.
And those big leaps can be f*$king scary.
So scary, that most people refuse to take them.
They talk about it ALL. THE. TIME.
But when it comes to actually following through, they're suddenly "too busy."
And become SO good at coming up with excuses, they could major in it.
Do you feel like that's you?
Do you feel like you could major in Excuses and graduate Summa Cum Laude?
You might not even realize it.
"Hollywood Success is Nearly Impossible" — kill. me. now. (After 26 television shows, I'm allowed to make that comment.)
Yes, it may not be easy to make it in Hollywood. But that’s not specific to Hollywood. It’s specific to any Big Dream anyone has ever gone after.
Big Dreams (yes, capitalized, they are proper nouns in my book), have pretty standard requirements: 1) Passion/Drive 2) Dedication 3) Skill 4) Persistence.
You know this. We all know this.
It’s standard for every Big Dream that ever existed, regardless of industry.
So why must Hollywood (or all the articles on Google) choose to make it a soul-crushing experience? Why must they make us feel bad about the decision to pursue this Hollywood-specific dream?
When you're pursuing a dream that ends in a HUGE way, such as winning an Oscar, or Writing a Blockbuster, it's easy to get paralyzed by how big that dream is.
I am a really big fan of HUGE dreams. If your dream doesn't scare the crap out of you, then it just isn't big enough. And life is too short NOT to shoot for the stars. So dream BIG.
But the question is, how to get there?
I'm going to start with a quote that might piss you off.
But trust me, I'm going somewhere with this.
It's by Jack Canfield, the Co-Creator of the Chicken Soup for the Soul Series, multi-millionaire, and Success Coach:
You may have to read that one more time. Go ahead, I'll wait.
This quote is pure brilliance, but I know it might be painful.
The other day I was sitting on the couch watching Gilmore Girls reruns.
And simultaneously wasting time on my cell phone.
Because that’s what we all do now.
A quick Facebook scroll led me to a live stream of Tony Robbins imparting wisdom on a high level group of leaders.
Have you SEEN Tony do his thing?
I swear, I wasn’t even that into him until his documentary came out on Netflix.
Now I have a slight obsession.
Every time I watch one of Tony’s videos I LEARN ALL THE THINGS!!
And they inspire me so much to get off my lazy ass.
Until the other day.
